Thanks Oak Park, IL my new heels are covered in Dog shit

Okay usually as a writer I have something to “say” or write about, and this shithole Oak Park, IL is usually the bane of my existence so I write about that. However, do you know what I have been doing the last three days? Cleaning. Dog. Shit. Off my yellow Seychelles heels, I got from DSW four months ago! DOG SHIT!

I know what you are thinking:

Was she drunk as hell and just walked straight into a pile of shit, the lush?

Was she out late at night, dressing provocatively and this is the Universe telling her “don’t be out at night” type of thing?

Was she out late at night, and probably needs glasses because she did see that big pile of steamy shit, the dumb bitch??

The Answer is no to all that shit.

In fact, it was around 5:30 pm-ish when I came home I was just not paying attention. I know that is one of my golden rules when living in Oak Park, IL: do not let your guard down, pay attention. Well, I was on the phone with Sarah and talking about the weekend when I walked into a fresh pile of dog shit on the sidewalk. And obviously, it was a big dog or a human being who decided take a dump on the side of the main sidewalk in front of my building on Harvey. And either the owner did not clean up because they were too fucking lazy, or the latter I was just dealing with a disgusting human being who thought it was funny to take a shit. Right there. In front. Of the building.

If you know the type of shoes I am talking about you will realize I knew immediately I stepped in a fresh pile of shit. You know OPEN TOE heels it was so nasty I had to go immediately to the basement and wash not only my heel off but foot as well. It was so fucking nasty. I cried because I just started to wear these heels out and they complimented a bunch of outfits.

I had to use bleach, tomato sauce and three types of soap on my foot because it stunk like shit and this was on Monday so it was not like I had the weekend to get the smell out! Then my shoes I had to wash dry then wash again multiple times, I wiped it down with antibacterial wipes and then some lemon juice. After two days of airing out I think I can wear them but now I got like PSTD from this event that every time I look at them I think of stepping in squishy dog shit. Thanks, Oak Park, IL thanks.

The Window on Sunday in Oak Park, IL

It was such a nice day on Sunday I decided to open a window to the courtyard and get some air into the place. Being a “vintage” apartment it can get stuffy and rank in this bitch. So I open up the window and thought “that’s nice” thirty minutes later Oak Park, Il showed its ugliness. “yep yep yep” that all I heard for like 15 minutes one of my dumb ass neighbors thought they should share their dog’s hyper activeness with the rest of the building.

I mean like we bought the dog, and are training it to be quiet in public right? No, my neighbor had that dog out there bouncing around and “yepping” so I go to the window to see the dog shitting and backing at the same time with…. The neighbor looking her ass my way! 

Uh look freak-o keep your eyes on your dog shitting all over the courtyard instead of looking and smiling at me. I closed the window and blinds and walked away. I moved to another window to stare back I guess without my ass providing a show she got bored and took her hyper dog inside. Wait! Without cleaning the dog shit up. (sighs) These neighbors in Oak Park, Il are ridiculous.

I wish I knew her email address so I could send here this:

A clip from the tv show Billions –https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E1OxEau2OS4

But she would probably respond like this clip from the movie I Love You, Man, the Psycho Bitch:  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hHeh50MRaWk

pomeranianThumb.jpg

Laundry in Oak PArk, IL

Arrrghh So I did my wash and I dried it brought it upstairs from the laundry area downstairs to fold and what is all over it? Fucking dog hair!!!! And I do not even own a dog! Now, I know it’s a public laundry area but man you would think these residents would have some decency to not wash whole dog beds or dog pillows in the regular washing machines with regular clothes. Some people like to go to work looking professional, and not having to worry about dog hair flying off their clothes into the air, in front of bosses, clients or fellow co-workers.

Now I have to use a lint brush and sit here and spend an hour getting all the dog hair out of my clothes when I do not even own a dog to necessitate that I should spend time out of my day to do this! This is one of the reasons I do not have animals so I do not have to do extra measures for cleaning my apartment or my clothes. I have owned dogs before and I have been very cautious and thoughtful of others when walking my dog and cleaning such things as a dog bed (HAND WASH BITCH!). But never have I ever had to deal with such callous disregard for one’s neighbors, what If I was deadly allergic to dog hair and dandruff? Oh, that’s my problem right? Oh but if someone sues these fucking dog owners and the building management because of allergic reaction they are the bad person here? Fuck that.

That’s why I will every time I step in their dog’ nasty dog shit I will wash the shows in the washer machines so they can get the full effect of what their sloppy, lazy ass owning of their dog entails and how it really affects others. Oh and complaining to management that does dick, they cannot even handle simple common sense security concerns let alone do something about this type of nasty ass behavior. Fucking nasty ass people. Really.

This is a link for those of you who face the same shit I do with ignorant fucking dog owners: http://cleanmyspace.com/pet-hair/

Personal belongings are always in front of Fire Exits In Oak Park, IL

Okay how stupid is it when your management company has to send out email reminders that your neighbors should not place their junk in public areas that act as emergency exits during building fires and such, I mean really?

You would think this would be second nature, or people would have common sense but not in my building, The building management Green plan management always sends out the same generic message every time: “Please remove any personal belongings that are stored in the front and back stairwells. There are to be no personal belongings stored in the common areas…

How about sending the lazy ass building maintenance guys to just throw the shit out? On the other hand, they could confiscate it and leave a message stating that the item is in storage and charge the fools everyday like $25 for each day it’s there. Maybe if you know who did charge their asses the fee the village of Oak Park would, i.e. the ticket or citation amount that the village would write the management company for having residents block these exit/entrance ways?

All these special idiots get is a crappy, unprofessionally email from the highly unqualified building management representative, who blandly tells my neighbors not to keep their shit out there. I bet if this was my ass (which is not!) they would just throw my recently sanded furniture (hint hint) out in the garbage, but no just this limp dick email. Bich Plz.

Detoxing from Oak Park, IL

I have actually spent the time off detoxing before heading… Anywhere. Ha plus I have written a couple of posts about my experiences in the last couple of days and I am writing some posts and scheduling them for my favorite season, Halloween, already. So when you think that I have less to say, oh no, I still do! So that way I have a clear head, and body detoxed as best as I could from Oak Park Il and 2016 I am so glad to be rid of at least one of these pains in the ass from my life!

Hopefully this will be a better year but with the privileged Assholes in oak park, Il I sincerely doubt it because they also draw out some type of crazy fuckery out of their hats like an insane Magician high on crack and anarchy, ready to surprise the world with their shit and nut job ways.

Just drive thru Oak park, Il and You will see what I mean, from the bold pieces of shit doing u turns in the middle of Harrison street where there is no fucking room to the People who push baby strollers out into the middle of a crossway on lake street while trying to corral their dogs at the same time! Oak Park, Il is especially littered with crazy fucking attitudes, “going ons” (that west side talk), and stank crazy yuppie, hippie crossbreeds that make it a subject of endless possibilities to cover and write about, onward and upward mother fuckers.

More Dog Shit on the sidewalk, leading up to the Apartment in Oak Park, IL

OMG its getting colder out and I am getting drunker because of the Cubs and the holiday season Woooooooo! Yea! So I am walking up the courtyard, up the sidewalk of my apartment complex enjoying life, being happy, doing the positive stuff! Thennnnnnnnnnn, of course Oak park, IL brings you back down, the littlest thing has a huge impact around here because this little dirty ass village does not let you rest. The impact is like the huge asteroid that killed the dinosaurs type of impact, with a little DOG SHIT all over the middle of the sidewalk to the point I have to walk in the grass where guess what? Where my fucking lazy ass dog owning neighbors let their dogs do their business, and DO NOT clean it up!

Neither does the property manager or any one doing any type of building maintenance for Greenplan management. Now not every dog owner is lazy, but the old lady upstairs for example, just lets her dog bounce around all day (as I found out on my one day off) for exercise then lets it shit and piss in the alley near one of my building’s back entrances. Rats food galore!

It is my belief that this is not is her dog, but this is the only entrance I can enter this building without the fear of being attacked by rodents! I was nearly attacked by raccoons when taking the garbage once. Therefore, my interest in keeping the area around the entrances clean is very personal, I even took pictures of how disgusting the situation was with the dog shit, in, the middle, of the sidewalk. It really gives responsible dog owners a bad name, and will probably give the management company a reason to raise the fees to have dog in these apartments. But oh well, you cannot fix stupid, nasty, or even fucking lazy.

Oak Park, IL related video: Man SHAMES Dog Owners Who Don’t Pick Up Poop

I have seen this video regarding irresponsible dog owners who do not pick up their dog’s poop and those who approach these individual owners. I hope you either get a laugh or a chance to see another point of view. I just want to explain how this is related: in Oak Park, Il there is a serious epidemic of irresponsible dog owners who just let their poop and their owners just do not pick up after their animals. Enjoy.

 

Wondering about that Rats-Dog poop correlation in Oak Park, IL

I was watching The Channel 5 news and they had this segment about fighting rats in the city of Chicago, that is bordering Oak park, il, with dry ice instead of the conventional bait poison they usually throw down when the residents’ report see rats to 311. And being a hater of rats, yes I do not think the “Black Death” in the middle ages was a good thing, sorry, I listened up.

One of the things that caught my ear was the fact that the head of Streets and Sanitation mentioned during the press conference that if residents could clean up their dog’s poop as it would help immensely. I tried to find the video clip of the Head of Streets and Sanitation stating that on the NBC 5 website but could not find it anywhere this is close as I came:

Chicago unveils new way to get rid of rats: Dry ice

That was from WGN Chicago’s website, but anyway it got me to thinking about Oak Park, IL and how the resident dog owners hardly pick up their animal’s poop even when there are actual signs posted to remind them to do so. I wondered how my neighbors, especially in this complex can attract rats with their laziness and straight up ignorance. My management company Greenplan management does not really regulate this issue at all, only charging the renter extra for their pet, nothing in regards to picking up dog shit, which in turn can be a health hazard and also become nasty ass rat bait.

Although I agree with the argument that it is hard for the company to catch these offenders I actually had no problem doing so, because these owners are so blatant about it. Hell, I hate to give ideas for making revenue to the village of Oak Park, Il or Green plan management because they are two entities that are complete idiots but why not raise the fees in areas that have a huge rat problem due to dog shit being left by the local dog owners.

Now that would make people wake up, to the issue, hell if I was going to be punished because my neighbor is a slob I would turn that mofo in five ways from Sunday! Obviously, if this head of the Streets and Sanitation in freakin Chicago, Il knows this is a problem then finding out who the lazy ass dog owners are should be easy. You know as a former dog owner I wanted to make sure this statement was true since I did not see it in later broadcasts, but I did find a number of sites online mentioning how dog poop attracts rats.

This is one of those (blog) websites: http://doodycallsdirect.com/Waste-Harms-Communities.html

So with so many websites stating this as a fact, and not trying to find out myself due to my hatred of rats and I do not like playing with dog shit I will defer to sites like this that the Sanitation’s guy statement was dead on. I hate to say it but this type of article only inflames my hatred for the lazy ass dog owners in Oak Park, Il. Those who either leave their pet’s shit on a neighbor’s grass and don’t pick it up or they pick up the poop and do not properly dispose of it! Meaning they do not throw in the garbage can, they just drop it on the ground outside their apartment entrance in the courtyard we both share. Ugh Nasty bitches.

I hope they bring this program to Oak Park, IL because this action is a whole lot easier than trying to change the cultural mindset of the lazy ass dog owners of Oak Park, Il. Seriously.